Just Say NO – The most powerful word you have.
It might seem counter-intuitive but we have to learn to say NO.
“There are only two words that will always lead you to success. Those words are yes and no. Undoubtedly, you’ve mastered saying yes. So start practicing saying no. Your goals depend on it!”
How BUSY are you?
We are often asked how we are, “BUSY” is a common reply. We have been indoctrinated to believe that we have to say “YES” to everything that crosses our path. Whether in our personal life or professional life. The aim is to achieve as much as we can in as short a time as possible. The ultimate result of this is that our lives have become filled with stress and a feeling of being overwhelmed. Busy has become the endemic disease in our modern culture.
Within our salon business and our personal life the difference between people who succeed and those who don’t, are those people willing to say “NO” instead of “YES”. Now for me success is defined as enjoying life with as little stress and overwhelm as possible, not how much money I’m making although it does seem easier to make money when we are not stressed and enjoying what we are doing.
No is maybe the most powerful word in our vocabulary. But over time we are overruled by people in power positions that saying no was wrong, as children saying no was easy, but it might have been inconvenient for our parents or maybe because it could have put us in a dangerous situation. Then as we grow we are told we have to consider other peoples needs and feelings. We may have been told that by saying NO is bad and is selfish. Is it any wonder as adults we have trouble saying NO.
So as any child/adolescent does we learned what we needed to do to feel safe, accepted and cared for and so we didn’t have to have those feelings of shame and guilt.
But here is the kicker, we are the ADULTS NOW. We have the power, we make the choices. We can choose what we say yes to but more importantly what we say NO to.
The Danger of saying YES.
Unlike any other time in history, we have the ability to go anywhere and do anything we want. We are in constant contact with everyone in our lives like never before, via phones, social media, email and messaging services the reality is that almost anything is possible for us, whatever we want to do. Unfortunately, we have been taught to say yes to everything, so instead of it being an amazing time to be alive with limitless possibilities, we have been snowed under the burden of not missing out and saying yes to everything in out lives and becoming BUSY.
Add to this the choices we make every day when it comes to food, clothing and the things we want to do and the things people expect us to do, and the things we need to do is it any wonder that we are in overload.You have heard of the phrase, too much of a good thing? Well, we have a superabundance of choices and tasks and instead of a better life, we have a busier more stressed out life!
We need to be clear on what matters to us, what our goals and values are when we say yes to something we are also saying no to something else. There will always be more to do than we have time available for not just in this lifetime but if we lived 10 lifetimes.
So how does this translate to our salon business?
Well, one of the first steps toward having success in our businesses is to have a clear idea of our brand, whether that’s in our business or how we portray ourselves as a stylist. We need to be clear on what matters. One of the most powerful things we can do is learn to say no. Both to ourselves and other people.
If you have a clear vision for yourself and have defined your values when that client comes in that really doesn’t fit you or your salon, you will be in a much better position to say no. There will always be more clients, when you say no to someone that doesn’t fit with your values then you are creating space to take on a client that will be more suited to you.
Get Clear on What Really Matters:
One of the most powerful things we can do is relearn how to say “No” – both to ourselves and others. Because in this busy, modern world there will ALWAYS be more to do than time available. What you say “No” to, frees you up to say “Yes” to something else.
And this is where you have to get your ducks in a row to enable you to become successful:
- Figuring out the vision you have for your life, and establishing your goals
- Deciding what really matters to you – that’s your personal and business values
- Learning to trust your intuition
- Noticing and paying attention to your own feelings and needs – self-care!
- Taking a more balanced approach to your work and life, family, and self.
So what now?
In closing learning when to say NO is about developing clarity in your visions and goals, Staying true to your values, that which you consider deeply important. Trusting your intuition and acknowledging your own feelings and needs as important so that you can confidently say no instead of yes and reducing your stress and overwhelm. Figuring out what really matters, then making choices that align with who we are and what we want from life. Because when we say YES only to the things that will enrich and enliven our lives and say NO to the things and people that move us further away from our life vision and values we become less drained, stressed and overwhelmed and then we really get to enjoy our life, and that is true SUCCESS!